|
|
THE RING BEAR
A little boy was in a relative's wedding, and as he came down the aisle, he would take two steps, stop and turn to the crowd (alternating between bride's side and groom's side), and while facing the crowd, he would put his hands up like claws and roar.
So it went, step, step, "ROAR," step, step, "ROAR," all the way down the aisle. As you can imagine, by the time he reached the altar, the congregation was near tears from laughing so hard.
The little boy, however, was getting more and more distressed from all the laughing, and was also near tears by the time he reached the altar.
When asked what he was doing, the little boy sniffed and said, "I was being the Ring Bear."
|
|
Web Fun
ODE TO A GOLF BALL
(Courtesy of Wally Mahoney, Laurel, Long Island, New York)
In my hand I hold a ball
White and dimpled, rather small.
Oh, how bland it does appear,
This harmless looking little sphere.
By his size I could not guess
The awesome strength it does possess;
My life has not been quite the same
Since I chose to play this stupid game.
It rules my mind for hours on end.
A fortune it has made me spend.
It has made me curse and cry
I hate myself and want to die.
I am promised a thing called 'par'
If I can hit it straight and far.
To master such a tiny ball
Should not be very hard at all.
But my desires the ball refuses
And does exactly as it chooses.
It hooks and slices, dribbles, dies
and disappears before my eyes.
Often it will have a whim
To hit a tree or take a swim.
With miles of grass on which to land
It finds a tiny patch of sand.
Then has me offering up my soul
If it will just drop in the hole.
It's made me whimper like a pup,
and swear that I will give it up.
And take to drink to ease my sorrow.
But The Ball knows … I'll be back tomorrow
|
