BELLEVUE BREAKFAST ROTARY CLUB

 IN THIS ISSUE:

Vol. 15, No. 41, April 7, 2003

WEB GEM

(From the “Keeper File,” here’s a story that reminds us of our mortality.)

TAPS

We have all heard the haunting song, “Taps,” generally played at funerals of our fallen heroes. It’s the song that gives us that lump in our throats and usually tears in our eyes.

Do you know the story behind the song? It has humble beginnings. Reportedly, it all began in 1862 during the Civil War when Union Army Captain Robert Ellicombe was commanding a unit near Harrison’s Landing in Virginia. The Confederate Army was on the other side of the narrow strip of land.

During the night, Captain Ellicombe heard the moans of a soldier who lay severely wounded on the field of battle. Not knowing if it was a Union or Confederate soldier, the Captain decided to risk his life and bring the stricken man back for medical attention.

Crawling on his stomach through the gunfire, the Captain reached the stricken soldier and began pulling him toward his lines.

When the Captain finally reached safety, he discovered it was actually a Confederate soldier, but the soldier was dead. The Captain lit a lantern and suddenly caught his breath and went numb with shock. In the dim light, he saw the face of the soldier. It was his own son. The boy had been studying music in the South when the war broke out. Without telling his father, the boy had enlisted in the Confederate Army.

The following morning, heartbroken, the father asked permission of his superiors to give his son a full military burial, despite his enemy status. His request was only partially granted. The Captain had also asked if he could have a group of Army band members play a funeral dirge for his son at the funeral. The request was turned down since the solider was a Confederate. But, out of respect for the father, they did say they could give him one musician.

The Captain chose a bugler. He asked the bugler to play a series of musical notes the father had found on a piece of paper in the pocket of the dead youth’s uniform. The wish was granted. The haunting melody, which we now know today as “Taps,” was born.

The words are:

Day is done, Gone the sun,
From the lakes, from the hills, from the sky,

All is well, safely rest, God is nigh;

Fading light, dims the sight,
And a star gems the sky, gleaming bright

From afar, drawing nigh, falls the night.

Thanks and praise, for our days, ‘Neath the sun, ‘Neath the stars, ‘Neath the sky,

As we go, this we know, God is nigh.

Web Fun

The RAINS ARE COMING!
All I really need to know, I learned from Noah’s Ark
(Sent to us by Bob Vallat)

  • Don’t miss the boat.
     
  • Don’t forget that we’re all in the same boat.
  • Plan ahead. It wasn’t raining when Noah built the ark.
     
  • Stay fit. When you 600 years old, someone might ask you to do something REALLY big!
     
  • Don’t listen to critics; just get on with what has to be done.
     
  • Build your future on high ground.
     
  • For safety’s sake, travel in pairs.
     
  • Two heads are better than one.
     
  • Speed isn’t always an advantage; after all, the snails were on the ark with the cheetahs.
     
  • When you’re stressed out, float a while.
     
  • Remember that the ark was built by amateurs; the Titanic was built by professionals.
     
  • Remember that the woodpeckers inside are a larger threat than the storm outside.


STRAIGHT FROM THE COURTS
These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters.

Judge: "Well, Sir, I have reviewed this case and I've decided to give your wife $775 a week."
Husband: "That's fair, your honor. I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."

Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year

Q: What gear were you in at moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you've forgotten?

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which!
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.

Q: And where was the location of the accident?
A: Approximately milepost 499.
Q: And where is milepost 499?
A: Probably between milepost 498 and 500.

Q: Sir, what is your IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.

Q: Did you blow your horn or anything?
A: After the accident?
Q: Before the accident.
A: Sure, I played for 10 years. I even went to school for it.

Q: Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
A: Yes, sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: What disco am I at?

Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
A: Would you repeat that question, please?

Q: The youngest son, the 20-year old, how old is he?

Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?

Q: So the date of conception of (the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
A: I resent that question.

Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?

Q: You say the stairs went Down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they go up also?

Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?

Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male or a female?

Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition that I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.

Q: All your responses must be oral, OK?
A: OK.
Q: What school did you go to?
A: Oral.

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him.

Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.


Driving in Iraq

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