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The Dating Game
Sergeant At Arms John Martinka introduced the latest schtick, The Dating Game: Let’s Get Mary a Date. Mary Bell was introduced as the Bachelorette (Is that a new word, or what?) and went behind the screen with her microphone. Her job was to pick from three contestants a partner on a future date.
The three contestants were selected from the BBRC membership. Bachelor #1 was introduced as “suave and sophisticated,” Chris Ballard. Bachelor #2 was billed as having “a love for the mountains and a writer for all seasons,” Bill Schultheis. Bachelor #3 was introduced as having a “European air, an off-kilt interest in filtering,” Robin Callan.
Introductions were followed by a round of interrogation from the lovely Bachelorette, which followed the approved script of asking embarrassing questions to produce goofy answers. This being a family periodical, details of this part of the skit are intentionally hazy.
Each of the contestants defended themselves gallantly when MC Martinka asked the crowd to pick their favorites. “Which one of the bachelors will Mary pick?” probed John. He went around the room to find out support for Bachelor #1, #2, or #3. At that very moment, from stage right burst the familiar sight of Lingenwino, who demanded that he be considered a contestant. Martinka wilted under the pressure and allowed Lingenwino to compete.
Mary asked a few questions, mostly about fine wine, and then asked what gift she could expect from Mr. L.
L: “At my home under the West Seattle Freeway, you could have my puppy.”
M: “And, where would we go for an evening out?”
L: “We’d look at the sights of the Duwamish Waterway.”
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Bachelorette Mary Bell asks questions and then makes her choice. Yecchhh! Nice teeth! |
That sealed it for Mary. She picked Bachelor #4, to the surprise of the audience. The surprise was really on them, however, when Martinka announced the default to the previous polling of who Mary would pick, since Bachelor #4 came on the scene late. “Therefore, since nobody guessed #4, everybody lays a dollar on the table!”
Another SAA doublecross, this one resulting in smiles all around and $63 in the Rotary Foundation kitty
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